Hello, I’m an eternal optimist. This is both a gift and a terrible affliction. I have a very positive attitude towards life, which is a very healthy place to be. The trouble is that kind of outlook can turn into optimism that can eventually lead to delusion.
I never consider failure or the fact that things might not work out as I had planned. I just expect glorious victory in everything I do. It’s an expectation of course, that will often disappoint and I never see it coming. I can’t possibly imagine failure; I just assume that everything will be ok. Not just ok but amazing.
This can range from the subtle to the sublime. For instance, I always place a huge expectation on weekends. I get to Friday and I’m beside myself at the possibility of getting extra sleep and going out to discover new levels of adventure and excitement. The fantasy in my head is almost like a sequence from movie, where everything is perfect and I have the time of my life. Like the ultimate road trip or a dream stag weekend. Of course, when I get to Saturday, it’s just another day; just an extension of the working week but a bit less work. Weekends often fall flat for me, after all the weekday hype; like a reoccurring New Years Eve.
To give you another example, on a slightly more superficial level, I’m convinced that Spurs will beat Real Madrid tonight by five goals. Despite being 4-0 down from the first leg, against one of the best teams in the world, my optimistic view of the world has managed to convince me, that scoring five goals tonight, is just a formality and that we’ll go on to beat Barcelona in the semi-final and probably lift the trophy in May. I’m not prepared for the opposite of that. It just hasn’t crossed my mind. The thought is too depressing.
I’ve tired to be pessimistic but it just doesn’t work for me. I tried it briefly when I was into The Smiths during the late eighties but I always went back to the more optimistic and fantastical world of Queen.
So yes; Spurs to win tonight, a lottery win on Friday and I’ll probably have an orgy with the Sugababes this weekend. I’ll see you on the other side.