1)      What’s with the Brighton & Hove? Why can’t we just be Brighton? Hove can have its own sign and identity but why does it have to be tagged onto Brighton? Brighton’s cool. It doesn’t need the weight of Hove on its shoulder. It’s holding it back. Brighton will never reach its full potential, whilst Hove is dragging its heels in. It’s a Noel and Liam situation. One deserves its shining reputation; the other is just dining out on the others success. Hove apparently wants to break away from the ‘B & H’ tag. Well go. Off you trot. Go and be your own thing. You need us more than we need you. Why are you so threatened by Brighton but ignorant of Portslade? Pick on someone your own size, like Mile Oak.

'Pretentious? Moi?'

2)      Why do people that live in Portslade, deny it? And why, when questioned further, will people insist that they live in Hove when it is geographically incorrect? Take for example, millionaires row along the seafront, home to Norman and Zoe, Nick Berry and formerly, Sir. Paul McCartney. Have a look at the A-Z (an underrated read) and you’ll see, quite clearly, that particular row of houses are in Portslade. However, if the Argus gets an opportunity to slip in any of those fore-mentioned names, (i.e ‘Macca’s moving out exclusive’) they will always, say ‘Hove-based… insert celebrity name here.’ Steve Coogan can claim to live in Hove, mainly because he lives in Hove. And what the hell is West Hove? Now, you’re just making it up. Don’t give me West Hove. You’re Hangleton and you know you are.


3)      If you’re standing on Church Street, talking loudly on the phone, arranging to meet ‘friends for latte,’ then you deserve Hove.